Underworld: Exposition

The first 15-20 minutes are chock-full of it. Part of the problem is that it’s a sequel and ended in to-be-continued fashion, so there’s a lot of catching up to do. Nobody goes into “Evolution” expecting “Citizen Kane” (and I’m pretty sure that I’m first and last person to put the two of them in the same sentence), but how about taking a stab at a decent story? This movie might have some of the dumbest characters that I have ever seen grace the silver screen. Dumber than the girls who go downstairs to investigate strange noises with partial nudity as their only weapon. Dumber than the protagonist who doesn’t check to see if the killer/monster is really dead before turning his back on him.
Why would you want to free your uncontrollable, bloodthirsty, werewolf brother with no real plan (I could understand if he thought turning William into hybrid would make him normal)? And if you’re strong enough to yank down a helicopter, do you really need a key to open his centuries old, iron maiden-like prison? If the bad guy will stop at nothing to get something in your possession, how about hiding or destroying it, rather a than wearing it in plain sight around your neck? If you’re a ruthless vampire who commissioned someone to build ye old iron maiden-like prison and it was supposed to be hush-hush, wouldn’t you kill the builder the minute it was completed? Also, if there was a record keeper who discovered your secrets, why in the hell would you exile instead of killing him (so he can later provide exposition to the protagonists, that’s why)? My biggest eye-rolling moment had to be a certain character’s out of the blue resurrection at the most opportune time.
“Underworld” had its flaws, but certainly not on this level. I'm a little surprised how much I disliked this sequel. I will say this much, the action and special effects in “Evolution” are very good, but the same time, it works against the story. Characters are so busy jumping through hoops, we never have a chance to get to know them.